I’ve had this post in my head for a few weeks now, but getting my thoughts down into words is quite hard as it’s a slightly complicated subject.
Anyone who has been reading my blog for a while will know that a few months ago I went through a big life change. I broke up with my long term boyfriend, moved back home to live with my parents and ultimately quit my job for a new one.
A lot of changes in very little time. It was much harder than I perhaps let on to some, whilst others bore the full brunt of the sadness that comes with a break-up and a fragile emotional state.
I feel completely different now. In those months after the break-up, I went through this transition almost. I learned to truly understand that my life wasn’t over. I could make it on my own if I wanted to, but the truth was that I didn’t want to. I missed my best friend and wanted to work things out.
Any relationship that ends has its reasons for doing so that are completely unique to the couple involved. Every couple operates in their own emotional space, a landscape that is impossible for others to make a judgement on when things go wrong (but they still will, of course).
Getting back together with someone you broke up with always has these negative connotations of weakness, but our reasons for splitting were ones we can luckily work on, and that’s exactly what we are doing. The dark cloud of stress was a big player in our decision to try to be apart – we forgot how to be a couple because we were too busy being stressed people who were having a hard time with everything.
It’s early days, but we are back together and we really are trying to resolve the issues we had. We still live separately due to the distance to my job, but by seeing each other at the weekends, it makes us appreciate our time together all over again. We are reminded of the fun that we have together, how we make each other laugh and ultimately how we brighten up each other’s day.
People often say that a relationship takes work – but what they forget to mention is that this work truly never ends. Even the happiest of couples have to work to remain content.
If you truly care for someone, and that care is returned, then you owe it to yourself to do your best to try and fix things together.